Tuesday, January 3, 2017

My Brawl with the Sprawl

HAPPY NEW YEAR Folks

While a new year kicked in, I sit here with so many thoughts boggling in my mind and not being able to pen down at least a few. Where do I start and what do I prioritize and what do I omit and what all to include is like a brain fogging question. 
Rewinding the past year, I just want to do a small round up of what happened around me. One major change that had happened last year was that which stands pale and tall and lifeless, which was left after scrapping off the green cover. Just to build those worthless concrete structures not being home for any but to stand proofs as display of the wealth, many trees were uprooted. Though it seems so trivial and common observation in our neighborhoods these days, this seemed a big concern for me.
I used to wake up to a beautiful green cover on all sides of my community, but just to satisfy some peoples investment needs and developers greed, most of it is scrapped off. And I wish at least, they let it out instead of leaving empty flats. I know I have already ranted enough in a previous post about this issue, but this isnt enough to vent out how much I feel for those lost trees. And you may ask, what about the place I live in which once might have been home for many trees. Yes, I do agree and I would like to defend saying that at least my community has planted many trees around and I guess we are one of those few communities in the city who have got a good amount landscaped area. Lucky isnt it?
What to say about the greedy developers?, a developer recently started building up in an empty lot which was long been abandoned. There is a graveyard just beside the property which was the reason why it was abandoned. This developer perhaps saw a great opportunity to turn that lot into a land of gold. The marketing strategies were like, erecting this life size hoardings that said, the property was close to a theatre, close to a famous temple etc, but the fact is above all it is close to a graveyard, where one may hear devil sing a lullaby or one  may wake up to witness a funeral ceremony.  And the esteemed buyers wouldnt want to peep to the lot beside before investing. There is another prestigious builder who uprooted almost thousands of trees to build a commercial and residential structure. They could still have saved some trees if they just went for residential structure but the greed has no end, they wanted more and more.
Not just the cluster of apartment blocks, but even most of the individual homes are also crammed. Sad that these homes that are built in individual lots have no setbacks left whatsoever, all four sides are caged with iron grills as if they self imprisoned themselves, and not even a single plant at times. I would say they just built a beautiful grave not a house, I guess at least a grave would have one small plant over it. One cant breathe the concrete, one only get oxygen from trees and plants not the concrete mass. Recently, there's this lady who shared a photo album on one of the forums I follow, she thought that was the best work of an architect and everyone else poured in appreciations for a design that lacked basic ventilation, breathing space and no setback. I was wondering what sort of an architect one would be if he cant think of ventilating the home with natural lighting but solely depend on power?, and who can't think of giving room for people to walk around but tightly pack with chunks of wood and pop? and lastly who cannot even leave basic setbacks around the house? If you think that, in today's day and age designing for crammed spaces is definitely a skill, I would undoubtedly agree if there is some skill shown but not if its a no brainer job.
Offlate, I have been on a house hunt to rent and some facts I found were so appalling. In the community I live which is of some 500 odd flats, I never thought finding a house for rent would be so difficult when there are so many empty flats. However, I was proven wrong. Many of the landlords arent ready to let, nor even bother to let. They bought and they never cared to look back at it. Either the flat becomes home for beehives or pegion nests or monkey shelters or turns out into a spooky den for Halloween. We snatch the animal shelters and build them a nice concrete shelter and let them live, how compassionate of us? This has been the case in many many communities in this city. And we still build more? 
Its painful to see so many unoccupied homes in these endless communities just adding up to the sprawl. Being in this industry, and understanding the system from inside, I can vouch for one thing...investing in a concrete structure is the worsest option in the current scenario. You are doing nothing but contributing to more deforestation and hike in price by creating unnecessary demand. You are just fueling the developers greed to build maximum no.of flats in a crammed space and make millions out of it. They could still build even if those just for the sake buyers dont buy, but less no.of flats and lesser profit margins. 
I seriously wonder how people are not thinking at all before investing their hard earned bucks, forget about those buyers who buy only for the sake of spending. I can only advise and make you buyers aware that please, please, please look around before you buy, do your thorough research, ask questions, and lastly buy only if it is necessary. And to those individual home owners, please make a breathable home, dont simply build a grave. Do approach a proper architect or engineer before you build a dream house.

Hope you all have a great year ahead.

Cheers

Jyostna

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Beating the Blues like Champ Mum

There are too many illusions around us that lure in a way that we begin to believe thats real. I have been through such since a long while. I created a perplexity around me. The mist of myth is slowly fading to reveal the reality. I read this beautiful line "monotony & solitude stimulates a creative mind" Many a times, either the monotony or the solitude keeps missing, and then we never realize that we have a creative mind and it can create wonders. 
Off late, I have made peace with my situation and I am more still and calm than ever before. It takes a lot to accept and come to terms with something that you have never contemplated. Though I never personally endorsed the stereotyped choices, at a certain point I started getting succumbed to such. The moment I cleared my mind of what I really am, I understand I am crossing over my own path. All I am talking about is an inner battle a new mom goes through. The stereotyped thinking I meant is either you choose to leave your little one with a daycare/parental care or you pause or give up your work to look after the baby. 
For many, including me pausing work is a big reason to start feeling low and give up dreaming about making it big that once you are. Your world starts to slowly cringe down to few others like you and you drift away in a world thats too far from what have created once. This happened to me and many others I know. Thats when we feel lost, depressed and sometimes not at ease. I honestly was not at ease though it was absolutely my choice to stay at home. For many moons, I stayed in a bewildered sphere. I kept consoling me as if I was sacrificing. This kept going until I got saturated and stressed. And then this crazy yet meaningful life changing thought came to my mind....I wondered what is that I am really missing, why I am unable to completely enjoy what I chose with my heart, why is the happy decision seeming more difficult to be pulled off??? In calm moments, I realized what makes me happy. 
I identify myself as a person who dwells where happiness is, no matter if it requires me to give up something and even if that something sounds too enticing, and my decision seems too adventurous and difficult. And I stood by those decisions, because they made me happy, they left me with beautiful memories. Had I chose to live otherwise with those somethings, perhaps I wouldnt have made great memories neither I would have felt so happy. And that was realization. There are many out there who have been boggling in this sphere, but just break away from the mundane and give it one clear thought, I am sure you will find your answers. I may sound like one old psychiatrist but thats very true. I kept reading every other piece of write ups by SAHM(stay at home mums) & Working mums, but I honestly never found my answers. I dont know why.  I am venting out my experience now with a hope to trigger those unanswered, lost questions that you have been dealing with. If so, I shall be happy and proud of myself because I know what sort of battle it is that you have been fighting without a clue.
Now, the reality is when you really have an inner urge to make it big no matter what, there is no need to feel low. Feeling low is a mythical illusion that one has carved out of expectations and stereotypes. Accept that this is just a pause, a much needed one indeed, to have no regrets that you missed your baby's very young age. This acceptance allows you to think and imagine better things other than cribbing about missing working lifestyle like your contemporaries do. Its great if you can balance both work and baby, its great even if you chose to give up work but its not great if give up the baby. 
A mother's duty is to nurture the child with love and affection, if you choose to seek something else over this, you better dont give birth. Just because you are a social being, you need not stick to the rules of the society when you dont really believe in it, it could be marriage or motherhood. I loved what Sania Mirza said to the interviewer about being judged for not being a mother to be called an actual achiever while she conquers the top seat in her game. How insanely minuscule narrow mindset we live with? This kind of social pressure is often leading many of our women to take motherhood as a compulsive choice rather than willful choice. Let not the social pressure clinch you in any which way. You will either ways be judged, questioned, grilled and baked, so choose what makes you happy and dont stop dreaming big because you chose to step down from the race for a while, not forever. 
These are my learnings over the past year..nurturing a child is no less than a job, enjoying your time off is not a sin, dreaming big is a must, make the most of it while it lasts.

#newmom #stayathomemom #makepeace

Cheers

Jyostna